Gracefully Broken….Not To Hurt You But To Use You

Over the past 7 years, there have been so many “opportunities” that looked so promising. Every time a door closed on a potential space we would think there were no more spaces. Then out of the blue, another space would be just as perfect as the last one. Each one I would be so excited about AND I could see the spa at that very location each & every time! We would spend thousands of dollars on conceptional drawings, submit our business plan, re-do over & over the financials and countless meetings…THEN…it would happen time and time again…DOOR CLOSED….NO-ONE would negotiate with us. We were small fish in a big pond. Each situation seemed to be more unfair than the last. I would retreat and grow further away from God’s plan…MY PURPOSE! So, the “opportunities” stopped. The money was gone. I had all kinds of reason I TOLD MYSELF why we were not given the opportunity from race, to being that small fish to not being a part of the clique. As I look back I realize simply…I was not ready, and it was truly Gods protection! If I would have opened a spa 7 years ago I’m sure I would have been out of business year one! It was all God’s plan of growing, teaching and transforming my life. He had to bring to the surface all the things I struggled with that I thought was just a part of my life…things I just buried & did not deal with let alone acknowledge them silently. How could I be part of transforming when I was not transformed? Rejection, fears, insecurities, daddy hurt, PTSD and a very painful soul-tie and the list goes on and on. I had to be gracefully broken. He breaks you not to hurt you but to use you in all the right ways…to use you in YOUR PURPOSE…again, how could I, if I did not? I had to turn them over to Him one by one to be prepared & yes, confront what I needed to heal from, to be broken and with grit re-affirmed. It was a war that stripped me down and built me right back up. He & I were soldiers together…He being my Captain that I knew to follow no matter the trenches.

AND HERE I AM TODAY, after all the doors being slammed, running out of money and knee deep in unresolved pains…in WELCOMED unchartered territory – I have a location, I have a signed lease and a build-out that has begun AND more poignantly, a grand opening date of June 1, 2018! Let’s sit in this for a moment! Yes, thank you, Jesus!

He said I was on the backside of the mountain, and He would bring me to the top. He said what He has put inside me is authentic & one of a kind…it CANNOT be duplicated. He said I will bring this spa forth without a penny to my name, that His people will sow a seed into my purpose and His vision!

And so, by His Grace & my GRIT (that He instilled in me), the journey continues, and support is ever so needed now. This is the time in the journey where fear can easily stampede me over because it is so close and because of the money it takes once you have a building that needs a build-out, setting a launch date and opening those doors to serve in MY PURPOSE!

I am always astonished and deeply humbled by all support!